Work

So I realized that I have not posted anything about working as a nurse. For those who don't know I work at Miller Children's Hospital in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit. Talk about starting my nursing career at a full sprint! I recieved ten weeks orientation, working with another nurse, and was then on my own. Most intensive care units give at least 6 months orientation, but not mine!! 10 weeks was just enough time to make me realize how little I really did know about being a nurse, and make me an anxious mess for the first few months. I can not even begin to explain the madness that is being a PICU nurse, but I can say that I have learned more than I ever did in nursing school, and more than I thought possible. The first few months were really tough. The times when I thought, "what the heck did I get myself into" were countless. I was a stress case at work, and away from work. The enormity of my job really sank in. The kids I care for are critically ill, and many of the medications I give if given wrong can potentially kill someone. Thats BIG. So needless to say the first few months were rough.

But seven months in I am starting to have more good days than bad. I don't fear going to work, (most of the time). And I really feel like its starting to sink in. Things are making more sense, becoming more second nature. Don't get me wrong, I still ask a million questions, and second guess EVERYTHING I do, but thats what makes me a safe nurse.

Though it may not seem like it, I LOVE my job. I love the central focus of it all. I am caring for a sick child and their families. And that is amazing to me. I love the science behind it, but most importantly I love psychosocial aspect. It makes all the craziness worthwhile. For twelve hours I do not exsist. For twelve hours I am paid to worry, to anticipate every worst case scenario possible. I don't always get to eat, I don't always get to use the bathroom. In fact half the time I forget I even NEED to use the bathroom. For twelve hours its not about me. And I LOVE it.